Tuesday, May 12, 2020

Demisexuality

The Official Demisexual Flag!

Demisexuality is defined as "a sexual orientation in which a person does not exhibit sexual attraction for anyone. However, an exception is one where someone has developed a powerful bond with someone. Please note that this bond does not have to be romantic in nature."

The focus of demisexuality is the lack of sexual attraction. Demisexual falls without the "graysexual" community (find the article I wrote on grays here -click-). Graysexuals only have sexual attraction very rarely and/or under very specific circumstances.

Demisexual was originally coined on an internet message board back in 2004. It faded into obscurity until 2008 where members of the asexual community found it and adopted it for themselves. There is a rumor going around the internet that this term originated on AVEN when that is NOT the case. Ever since the word has skyrocketed into popularity and is possibly the most used sexual orientation term within the graysexual community (possibly more popular than "graysexual" itself). The person who originally coined it didn't take it seriously but it is now a well-recognized term within the asexual umbrella. 

The flag colors mean this:  Black stands for asexuality.  Grey represents Gray-Ace and demisexuality.  White represents sexuality.  Purple represents the community. I was unable to find the flag origins (when it was created and by whom). 

People who are demisexual can work in the sex industry (erotic writers, sexologists, erotologists, on the set of porn shoots, escorts, etc.) and it doesn't invalidate their sexuality. Demisexuality is not choosing to be celibate. It is not a conscious choice to choose to be or not to be sexually attracted to someone. 

If you would like to learn more about demisexuality, check out these links!

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